Thursday, November 24, 2016

I am thankful.

There is a lot that I can say I am thankful for.  I have a wonderful husband and an amazing son who are the world to me.  I have a great job that helps put a roof over our heads and food on the table.  I have my health.  I want for little and my cup overflows. But this Thanksgiving I get a chance to really understand what I am thankful for:  Family.

I've never really had the best relationship with my family.  I never really knew my mom [though recently we have tried reconnecting] and my dad worked a lot, leaving my grandparents to raise my brother and me.  I was angry, confused, and a pain in the butt.  

But I am thankful.

I am thankful that my grandparents raised me.  I honestly do not know where I would be without them.

I am thankful that they are the head of our family.  That we gather at their house for holidays.  That I can turn to them if I need help or just someone to talk to. 

My grandmother was recently diagnosed with cancer and my world stopped. I can think of a million things that I want to say about it but mostly it just straight up sucks.  I can't image my world without her.  I hate that I took her for granted so many years, thinking that she will always be here for me.  

I have to stand strong on my faith and my God knowing that everything will work itself out.  That this will not be the last holiday that I get to spend with her, listen to her stories, and just enjoy her presence.  I am soaking up her knowledge, watching home movies, copying down her recipes, and just enjoying life.

I am thankful.